In this post
I have recently found out my daughter is neurodivergent and naturally I had questions.
When I started speaking to others who were or knew of people on the spectrum, I quickly began to notice traits in my daughter and myself.
I wanted to try and understand what it all meant. I even went on a course to better understand autism and neurodivergent minds, which led me down a path I was not aware of.
When I spoke to others about what I had learnt I was faced with lots more questions I had not even asked and this prompted me to write this post.
In this post, I will be covering the questions I have been asked and the ones I ask.
These are questions like “What’s the difference between neurodivergent and neurodiverse?” or Is it called Neurodivergent now instead of Autism?”
If you are looking for answers for yourself, a loved one or just curious then hold tight as we delve into a whole new mind.
What does Neurodivergent mean?
Neurodivergent is simply differences in the way people think and behave compared to a neurotypical mind in society’s view.
“What makes you think neurodivergent is different? Maybe the neurotypical brain is the one that is different?”
This is a question I asked myself and I have been asked, and the answer quite simply is that it could be.
Once upon a time, there was a big difference in the number of people who were neurodiverse compared to the people who were not and because of the lack of knowledge, these people did not get the support or care that they truly needed.
What they got in some cases was bullying, told they were stupid, expelled from schools and just plain weird.
This is wrong, and now things are slowly changing but so much is still not understood about the mind, as we know the brain is a complex organ and every individual is different.
Women and girls struggle to get a diagnosis due to the different characteristics they show from boys and because less is known about females with autism. They are often misdiagnosed with mental health issues instead.
But the ratio has gone from 1 in 10 to 2.1.
It is narrowing and we need to make people aware of how vast the spectrum is.
Up to 70% of autistic women die from suicide. That is huge.
Who is Neurotypical?
Someone is neurotypical if you are not bothered by loud noises, crowds, or bright lights, does not have obsessive traits and finds it easy to make eye contact and communicate with others.
Basically the opposite of a neurodivergent person.
What is Autism? Is it the same as Neurodivergent?
Neurodivergent now covers a range of autistic traits. Autism is a range of conditions in which a person may struggle with communication, behavioural challenges and repetitive or obsessive behaviour.
Autism Spectrum Condition is now preferred, rather than Autism Spectrum Disorder.
A spectrum is the mild – severe range of behaviours with certain features.
More than one in 100 people are on the autism spectrum and there are around 700,000 autistic adults and children in the UK. (autism.org)
Boys are four times more likely to get diagnosed than girls and here’s why.
Females are more likely to get misdiagnosed than boys due to their ability to mask and they often show different characteristics of autism than boys do and the stereotypes that go along with autism.
Girls can be very sociable, hence the masking and are often early readers. (hyperlexia)
They still show some of the same characteristics as boys such as focused interests and repetitive/obsessive behaviour.
Some other non-stereotypical traits are twirling their hair and reading all the time.
Please be aware that every individual is different and that is the same for autistic people, each neurodivergent person can show completely different characteristics even when they have the same condition.
You can read more on female autism here.
Is it still called Asperger's?
Yes and no. There has been some controversy about the name and whether it should be changed due to Hans Asperger, a paediatrician doing a study into autism in the war.
He did an 8-year study with the Nazis, so It is quite understandable why some may not want to have that title as their condition.
Asperger can be mild, which means it can be misdiagnosed and often people who have Aspergers can maintain their daily lives without too much difficulty.
*They may appear clumsy
*Struggle with communicating with others
*Have a sing-song voice or high-pitched
*May not understand humour
*Want to make friends but unsure how to do so.
*Repetitive and or obsessive behaviour
*Come across as inappropriate or rude
*Very organised
*Excessive planning
*Sensory Issues
Autistic disorder, Isn't this the same as being autistic?
This is actually a similar condition to Aspergers but more severe. It is also a condition that is most likely to get diagnosed.
People with autistic disorder can suffer from language and communication difficulties.
*Nonverbal language
*Poor eye contact
*Struggle to understand emotions
*Have fixed interest and need a routine
*There will be considerable round-the-clock care.
What is Childhood Disintegrative Disorder
This is rare and severe.
The person can lose skills they had learnt and sometimes suffer from fits.
Is High Functioning Autism now called Asperger's?
HFA is not a medical term or a diagnosis, but people with HFA are usually without a learning difficulty.
These types of autistic people may show common signs like communication and social difficulties.
Have a delay in motor skills, dislike loud places, and bright lights, find it hard to read facial expressions and want to make friends but are unsure about how to go about it.
That being said there are lots of HFA individuals that do well in school, go on to have their own business and don’t have problems with stress or being overwhelmed by loud noises.
In childhood diagnosis, children can be diagnosed with HFA and then later in life changed to Asperger’s.
I can never sit still, do I have ADHD?
This is the inability to focus and remain still, someone with ADHD can show impulsive behaviour and can have learning difficulties too.
ADHD is a neurodevelopmental psychiatric disorder. You can have this alongside Autism Spectrum Disorder.
This is still under the umbrella of Neurodivergent.
You can go to your GP to discuss the possibility of ADHD.
To have Dyslexia don’t you have to see words backwards?
No this is a myth.
Dyslexia is a condition that affects reading, writing and spelling.
This is a learning difficulty and you can experience this with or without autism.
I have been dyslexic ever since I can remember but I never had support and was told to sit in the back of the class at school and called stupid.
It’s not nice and not fair, these words have haunted me my entire life, but look at me now, eh?
I have OCD because I like my clothes to be colour-coordinated, that's OCD, right?
OCD is a mental health condition and can happen at any time. You can be born with OCD or can develop OCD due to trauma or a negative situation.
What you often see with OCD is someone suffering from anxiety, depression, social exclusion and difficulties in managing daily life.
OCD is a compulsion, not a passion or something you like to do, this can interfere with your daily life and other people’s lives too.
Despite this being a mental health condition, this too is part of being neurodivergent.
What is Repetitive Behaviour? And is it the same as OCD?
Repetitive behaviour is normally one of the first signs as a child that they could be autistic.
People can have repetitive behaviour all day long or just when they are stressed.
Types of repetitive signs are:
*Talking nonstop about an interest even if others show no or little sign of interest.
*Doors/Windows
TV characters
*Famous people
*Lining things up
*Collecting stones, sticks, bottle caps
*Adverts for particular products
*Projectors
*Bikes
*Trains
*Mechanical things
*Computers
*Dates
*Gardening
*Animals
*Postcards
What does Dyspraxia mean?
Dyspraxia means finding planning difficult due to the messages not correctly being sent to the brain.
This can also mean people with Dyspraxia suffer with coordination, balance, language, communication, thoughts and preparation.
This can be a real struggle in a person’s daily life.
People with Downs Syndrome can’t do normal things, can they?
Downs Syndrome is a genetic disorder (extra chromosome) and this means people with Downs syndrome can have delays in physical and emotional growth, learning difficulties and distinctive facial features.
Each individual can have mild-severe co-occurring conditions.
Downs syndrome is rare alongside autism.
If I have a Learning difficulty does that mean I’m disabled?
A learning disability is different from a learning difficulty. A learning difficulty does not affect intelligence.
Learning difficulties can be mild to severe, some people are born with learning difficulties and some happen and sometimes for unknown reasons.
People with learning difficulties can find it hard to understand others, and difficulties processing and expressing themselves.
They may also have language skills struggles, affecting reading, writing and counting.
All this means they can act out and have behavioural challenges.
What is SPLD?
This is a specific learning difficulty that doesn’t affect intelligence.
Learning difficulties are covered under being neurodivergent.
Mental Health conditions are not part of being neurodivergent, are they?
Anxiety, mood disorders, eating disorders, self-harm, addiction and depression are common conditions and are often co-occurring with autism.
No one is sure if they are developed due to an individual’s needs not being met, stress and being overwhelmed or if it is part of autism itself.
Mental health conditions such as anxiety, depression and OCD are part of being neurodivergent.
SPD, is this a real disorder?
Sensory Processing Disorder can have a huge impact on a person’s life.
You can still have SPD without autism.
People often experience sensory overload, increases in anxiety and depression, behavioural challenges, restricted diet and social exclusion.
In some areas, SPD is not recognised without autism.
Is it a hobby or an obsession?
This is a common question and understandably so too.
There are criteria to be met that tell a professional if this person has OCD or just a passion/hobby.
These are:
*Can the person stop this activity independently?
*Is the interest impacting the person’s learning?
*Is this limiting their social opportunities?
*Does this person’s interest cause significant disruption to others?
What are the positives about being Neurodivergent?
There are so many positives about being neurodivergent, these are anything from a person’s obsession with computers leading them to have their own successful business in IT to being what is called a Salvant and becoming a leading role in their community. (Extremely skilled in an area) for example arts, music, science, maths and languages.
Neurodivergent people are just people like anyone else.
They still feel joy, sadness, anger and happiness just like anyone else.
We all deserve to be treated equally regardless of our differences.
Do I need a Diagnosis?
I truly believe getting a diagnosis is important to any individual regardless of how mild or severe their autism is.
Having a diagnosis can open doors to support in education, work, social and health services.
This can give people relief, and an understanding of themselves they didn’t have before.
I can also understand that getting a diagnosis can be hard, emotional, and long, can be diagnosed with another condition and sometimes you do not receive one at all.
Some people do not wish to have a diagnosis of autism due to worrying about the label and what others may think of them or being treated differently.
This does not mean it isn’t worth chasing though.
I will follow through with my daughter’s diagnosis and for myself.
It is never too late to get support.
Here are some links to help you if you wish to get a diagnosis.
Thanks for reading.
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The person behind it all
I am a Mumma of three, a Wife, a Home Educator, a Blogger and lastly a Chronic Pain Sufferer.
The most common questions I get asked are “How do I get my hair curly, is it natural?” “
“How are you so organised?”
“You must be really smart to educate your children, are you a teacher?”
and lastly “What is CRPS?”
I have suffered from chronic pain since the age of 10, it has been a daily struggle ever since.
I know thousands of people suffer as I do and I want to share what helps me and my expertise in CRPS, chronic pain and more.
So, I started this blog to share my answers to those questions, journey and experiences with you. I have always been passionate about health, personal growth, and creating a balanced lifestyle for myself and my family.
Searching for ways to enjoy life in a minimalistic way, be part of my children’s education and reduce stress and pain as a whole is important to me.
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